Me,myself and my pride (6-26)

I am sitting by myself at a park. She comes to me. From the smoke I let dance out of my mouth. The smoke sneaks across the table and danced with the wind until it snaked out her body across from me. She takes a seat from me across the table.
“your still writing.” She smiles at me. Her brown eyes watching my pen spread words across paper. I slightly nod my head to show I heard her and keep writing. She leans her body over the table bringing her face close to mine.
“What is that your smoking?” She asks her nose curing up trying to smell the smoke that sneaks through the air. I don’t answer her I just gently let the smoke breeze toward her face. “Oh, well at least it’s better than that other stuff.” I gently let my smartest smile sneak across my face. Satisfied my pride turns and faces the play ground. She watches the children swing across monkey bars.

I break the silence. “I feel like I’ve been writing for years.”

“That’s good.” She replies never letting her eyes leave the children. “I saw what happened today and your still writing.” She titled her head back.
“I’m very proud of you.”
I stop writing and watch the children with her.

“I don’t know if I am a fool or if she is the fool.” I say shaking my head.
My pride laughs and turns her head slightly showing me her playful grin.
“You know what I think.” She said.

I catch her eye and respond “and you know what I think.” I look off and watch the children.
“So..what does that mean?” I speak up again. “That we both are?”

“her more than you.” She responds turning her head back to watch the children. I roll my eyes and enjoy the cigar I had long been neglecting. My pride turns and again faces me. “you don’t have enough confidence in your dream. I know you see it in your eye you lack faith.” She says matter –of- fact, as she pats me on the head. I watch her pat me.

“Sometimes I wonder if I’m not just tricking myself. If I’m just not self delusional.”

Her face turns into a sharp frown and she takes her hand back from my head.
“What makes you think that?”
I again enjoy my cigar but this time its long and slow.

I let the smoke pour out with my words. “That’s what my father leads me to believe.” My pride sighs but doesn’t lose her frown. “Him? Well do you believe it? Haven’t we already had long conversation about him?” she says. I only nod my head.
“Don’t let him stop you. Reach for that dream in your eye. You’ve made it this far, how can you stop now? All that you have done will be for nothing. Your dream is close. I can smell it like the cigar smoke in the air.”

I look up at my pride and we stare into each others eyes for a while until I ask. “What am I going to do about her?”

Again my pride smiles and pats me on the head. “Don’t worry about her. You just write.” Turning to face the children my pride speaks again. “Even she tells you that.” I enjoy the cigar and pick my pen back up. Almost as if my pride saw this she speaks. “you’ve had enough heartbreak for one notebook, just write” I blow out the smoke and listen to her talk. “Everything you need to know is in your eye.”